Heads You Lose; Hearts You Win- 4 (Final)

He’d been trying to reach her since the very onset of the plot but the loud nature of their jubilation over her imminent fall kept her conveniently distracted, thus she shook off his every warning and nudging as though He were the bothersome distraction.

The others mocked Him and had a wonderful time while at it. Prior to her getting together with her boyfriend, they had all been less than insignificant because of Him. He’d been in charge and they knew it as each feeble attempt made to overthrow him backfired and caused her to even hold on tighter. She had just begun to experience real growth… until she met her weakness. He was as charming as she was naïve and as devious as she was easily swayed; and he was all they needed to make their dreams come true.

Gradually she got a lot busier – working at church, evangelizing, going out on charity outreaches, helping out the elderly people in her neighborhood whose children were all grown…and trying to get the fellow she had begun crushing on to get to church and to meet Jesus.

Soon there was hardly time to fellowship with her maker.

Then all of a sudden, everyone seemed to notice how gorgeous she was and in no time, there were advances from every corner; co-workers, clients, church members – everybody wanted to have a shot at winning her heart. Of course, it became sort of a nuisance and soon, a good percentage of her thoughts were focused on figuring out an effective solution to this challenge. Then, it progressed to figuring out the best way to pick out the ‘right man’ amongst all the available options that God had – she assumed – brought her way.

Soon in her hunt for who should’ve been her second love, she pushed her first to second place.

Slowly and steadily, she let the enemy use her own hands to chip away at the most important part of herself. Thus with consistent neglect, disregard, and the absence of frequent communication, her once blooming relationship with her Savior began to wilt, and the flesh she had been made dead to…she fought to resurrect.

While veraciously attacking her body with increased excitement, and in a manner that would make one imagine the profession of love were directed at God, he muttered breathlessly just how much he loved her - and she froze.

His thoughtless words echoed in her heart. Oh God, I love you so much!

...she used to say the exact same thing.

All at once, like buds of cotton were instantly plucked out of the ears of her heart, she heard Him. Clearly and distinctly, like he were closer than the aroused individual pressed against her body, she could hear Him calling her back; reminding her how much she was loved by Him, reminding her how much she used to love Him and letting her know she could still walk away. Right away.

Without further prompting she peeled her arms off his sweaty neck and pushed his bewildered face away from her body. In times past she’d often confessed her love for this sweet gentle person within - just as the ‘hungry’ fellow had done as he struggled to balance his breathing - but then without noticing precisely when, she didn’t anymore. And how could she, when she’d let so much garbage waltz in, that there was no more room in her mind for Him?

She adjusted her clothing calmly and unlocked the car door once again, simply shaking her head to every attempted protest from him. She showed him her wristwatch to indicate that she had overstayed her welcome – whether or not she had in his opinion - and got into the driver’s seat. When she looked at him she smiled, but the smile faltered as immediately images of the past few minutes bombarded her mind and a wave of guilt and shame flooded her insides. She turned away but then He spoke  within her again, the voice she had ignored for far too long, and the soothing truth of scripture calmed her. Romans 8:1---Psalm 37:24---Proverbs 24:16… She mentally quoted and re-quoted the verses until she could think of nothing else but the redeeming love and forgiveness Christ made available to her in spite of her weakness and display of carelessness. She faced him again and smiled, promising to have his car returned in good time and knowing without a doubt that the car would be the only thing returning to him from her.

With that she backed out of his driveway and headed for the entrance gate, momentarily feeling sorry for the security warden she was going to inevitably rouse from slumber, but unable to stay on that thought for too long with all the joy and gratitude that threatened to erupt from within her.

As she headed home feeling elated, she momentarily became particularly conscious of the calm beating of her heart – which was in sharp contrast to its general state in recent times – and immediately had something of an epiphany which she noted for future reference.

Although filled with gratitude and thanksgiving to God for providing a way out and making available a second chance for her, she came to grasp that things might have turned out a lot differently – and not gotten so out of control maybe - if she’d simply listened to the One speaking to her heart from the beginning…

It was a lesson she would not be soon forgetting.

THE END.

Thank you for staying with me till now! ^_^

Please share your thoughts (to comment, click on the post title and scroll to the bottom of the page) - I'd love to hear your views, experiences, writing tips, &suggestions as well...

:D

xxx, Kwiksie,~

Heads You Lose; Hearts You Win- 3

She laughed off his request for her to spend the night and tried to maneuver past him but her attempt was the truly laughable event. He raised up the dangers of her leaving by public transportation so late at night and she countered him by reminding him that he owned several cars and that she was a fantastic driver. Well, he let her know, it turned out that only one of the cars had fuel and he couldn’t let her take it in case he had an emergency...

On and on they went.

He reiterated to her that his suggestion was prompted by nothing other than concern for her safety and she informed him that her stubborn insistence was prompted by concern for her reputation. Finally, conceding defeat, he let her know he was going to have to take out fuel from his generator to transfer to one of his cars for her to take herself home. She sat and waited in his living room and after about ten minutes he returned, letting her know the car was ready.

He didn’t have the faintest odor of petrol on him – but what did she know?

She never thought the transfer of petrol could be done so quickly – but then he’d probably done it so many times prior, that he'd perfected the process.

When they’d strolled round, she’d noticed that the generator house was quite a distance from the main building – but hey, she wasn’t Sherlock Holmes so….

Certainly it couldn't be that he'd had fuel in all his cars the entire time. That would mean he lied!
He wouldn't lie just to get her to stay the night. What for?

So after gaining a massive number of points on the ‘Self-deception Scale’, she thanked him and they both walked to the car outside. Just as she was about to get in the driver’s seat he made a sound of mock horror, asking if she she’d found their day together so dreary that she couldn’t even squeeze in a proper goodbye. So she got out and he plastered her to him like stickers on a car bumper - and they called it a hug. Then she tried to pull away but he held on tightly, his face merely inches from hers’– and they called it romantic.

Then he decided to kiss her. And kiss her. And kiss her, until the automatic lock of the car door activated itself. But this time she was quiet as her thoughts seemed to suddenly freeze…

Plus she really didn’t have the breath to call it anything.

Then his lips strayed to the side of her neck, and as though controlled by the same remote, his hands joined in the movement. However, his increase in movement seemed to have the exact opposite effect on her sensory-motor skills. The only things she was sure were moving were her blouse as it progressively inched up over her abdomen guided by his hand, and her chest as the beat of her heart adopted a dramatically quirky rhythm. There was so much tension in her chest, and this she found slightly confusing considering the weightlessness she felt in her stomach.
(It appeared the latter had chosen to so quickly discard the memory of the meal recently packed in it.)

This was it! The moment they had all been waiting for! The complete attention of her physiological system was zeroed in on the very novel, very exciting, very heady feelings the team of his hands and lips were evoking in her. She made a pathetic attempt at protesting and he duly ignored it. What was she doing!? Her brain frantically searched for something to disguise as a logical explanation for her current on-going actions (or inaction) in order to put her at ease and dissuade her from putting an abrupt end to his onslaught.

It was no big deal. They’d been dating for a pretty long time now. This was so much more acceptable than those shameless individuals who would let a complete stranger have sex with them the very same day they met the individual. Plus this wasn’t really sex, it was just common foreplay. There really wasn’t that much harm in letting him do everything but stick his penis in her so it was totally fine. Look at her parents for goodness sake! They’d had her out of wedlock and they were such awesome people --- loved Christ more than anyone she knew. There was no way this was a big deal, she just had a problem. A goody-two-shoes, super-uptight, possibly judgmental, I-must-be-perfect complex. And if she didn’t loosen up a bit, she was definitely going to lose this amazing man "God had brought into her life". She couldn’t let that happen. God would even be angry with her!

So all of a sudden she mentally healed herself from her temporary paralysis and decided to help him out, flinging both arms about his neck and tilting her head back to make access to hers’ easier. He set to work – taking the hint as well as the prerogative of permitting his hands broader coverage of its lower environment...just as its teammate had received in higher regions.

Meanwhile, everyone applauded the brain for an excellent job done. It was going better than they all expected. Over the past months she’d invested a substantial amount of time into polluting her mind - the same mind that had been undergoing stages of renewal by the word of God - and thus , effectively weakened her stance and convictions on major and essential truths. By reason of this, most were hardly worried that some moral reservation would rear its head at this time and mess up all their fun. They were too sure!
However, in the midst of all this ruckus, one person was markedly unimpressed by the antics of the brain and the others and had not ceased in his attempt to alert her to how the lot of them were merely using her to 'catch trips' (fool around). She just didn't seem to hear Him anymore...
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To be continued on next post...

xxx, Kwiksie~

Heads You Lose; Hearts You Win.- 2

His house was really lovelier than she’d expected and the extra touch of little flower gardens which followed to the side the tiled walking paths that ran round the house’s perimeter completely stole her heart. Seeing how much she appreciated the surroundings, he suggested that instead they prepare the dinner he’d planned previously to take her into town to enjoy and, of course, she agreed immediately. After all, it was a great opportunity to spend more time enjoying the natural beauty he’d cocooned his home in. Within her however, she had this inkling that she ought to just insist on the initial plans and enjoy the surroundings on some other occasion (when it wasn’t so late in the evening perhaps) but she immediately squelched the thought, convincing herself that the fact they were going to be eating outside made it all the more harmless.

Never mind that the cooking was going to be done inside the house.

Never mind that they were the only two individuals currently on the premises.

Never mind that the day would depart to introduce the night regardless of whether or not they fed.

She persuaded herself with her ‘seeming’ logic and they set to work on their meal.

Cooking with him turned out to be - great fun actually. They cracked jokes, reminisced on their days in University, shared their understanding on the message preached the preceding Sunday at church – all the while they worked; basically having a wonderful time in each other’s company. Every-so-often though, when he’d manage to get close enough (either to help her open a can of peas, or cut the tough part on some piece of meat – or whatever), he’d use the opportunity to steal a light kiss or tickle her or brush off this stray particle of spice or that piece of onion stuck somewhere; just basically ensuring that the communication lines between both their bodies were relatively open.

Did she notice?

Without a doubt.

Was she convinced they were innocent gestures and maybe even coincidental?

Uhm...yeah.

With that conviction – regardless of how false - she declined to comment nor rebuke him for the several unnecessary caresses and pokes and hugs and pecks. She didn’t want to ruin the fun time they were having and dampen the mood. He’d had a really rough week and this day together was supposed to relieve him of some of the tension he’d accumulated; get him to relax and just enjoy being with each other. He already knew her reservations about a lot of things and it’s not like he wasn’t Christian either so if he wanted to just play around for one afternoon and cross a few boundaries because of how terribly he’d missed her or something, she wasn’t about to be the super-uptight girlfriend who was ever poised with a strict, ‘rules-soaked’ rag to wipe off any and every semblance of delight or happiness from their relationship and most especially, from his handsome face. God forbid that she push him away by being ‘over-righteous’. So she let it slide and simply chose to enjoy the moment (s).

Their meal was a huge success – they would know since they were the consumers – and they sat for a spell or two, complimenting each other on their individual culinary prowess and flirting lightly. Of course, she’d lost track of time and once this track was once again rediscovered by her, she almost panicked – considering for the first time how concerned her flat-mates would be since her phone battery had perished hours ago. He tried to calmly reassure her but her guilt drowned out his voice. It’s not as though she hadn’t come in late before but she’d always kept them in the loop regarding her whereabouts. That she’d been so irresponsible as to not once consider them with every hour that drew the morning closer both astounded and embarrassed her.

He affectionately hushed her, promising that her flat-mates would not be the least concerned and were probably sound asleep. She bought into it, though commonly scarce sense could easily prove him a fibber, and decided she would just help him clear up the dirty dishes and then leave.

So they both transported all they had used for their outdoor meal to his kitchen.

Then they both washed and dried all they had used for their outdoor meal in his kitchen.

Then he watched her arrange all they had used for their outdoor meal in the cabinets in his kitchen.

And when she was done and ready to leave, he was standing in the doorway…an indication that he would rather prefer that they spent a little more time in his kitchen...

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To be continued in next post...

xxx, Kwiksie.~

Heads You Lose; Hearts You Win.- 1

They had been waiting a long time for this moment and it was finally here.

Everything was in place. Each had been anticipating this for quite some time and they knew success was pretty much in the bag if they could manage to push her far enough. If they could overwhelm her for just so long…

It was almost a no-brainer that the two would need little to no assistance once they were given a good kick-start. In fact, they figured they could get her to decide to take things to the climax herself even.

And that would make her free-fall even more spectacular; mostly because she would have unwittingly helped dig her own pit anyway.

It was so deliciously ironic.

Yes indeed. Every invaluable party to the implementation of this long time plan was on standby. Her ego, her emotions, her fears, her lusts, her weaknesses – everyone was in anticipation of some excitement.

She let out an adorable laugh and took a small sip from her glass of juice as he made a wisecrack about his arrogant, under-qualified boss. He had just closed from work and they were having a great time at his very stylish bachelor pad in an estate a few blocks from his office complex. He had finally won. Since they’d begun dating seven months ago, he’d tirelessly made one attempt after the other to get her to come over but she’d turned him down every time. In her opinion, it wouldn't have been decent, since they barely knew each other – and he lived alone. Thus, visiting her at the apartment she shared with two other ‘sisters’ from church had to suffice, aside from their other rendezvous at restaurants, malls and the like.

Now however, she was more comfortable with him. She knew him to a reasonable extent and was certain he was the last person on earth who’d try taking advantage of anyone – least of all her. He was a gentleman before he was even human as far as she was concerned and she trusted him completely…as she did herself. Obviously she wasn't a baby. There was no way she would let her heart out-yell her head in the permanent squabble they seemed to be in these days – especially whenever she was near him.

As he talked she zoned off and found herself imagining those excellently crafted lips of his making an impression on hers – and oh, what an impression she was certain they’d make! When he had to laughingly wave a hand in front of her face to regain her attention she shook off her distracting fantasies and chastised herself for letting them roll once again. Ever since they’d met, she’d gradually begun loosening the ribbons of scriptural discipline with which she’d kept her mind wrapped since she got saved, till it was left completely uncovered. Now she couldn't seem to keep one sensual or sexually unattached thought out of her head once she was near him, or she thought of him, or she heard his voice….

He seemed to like it that way though, saying she needed to be more open-minded and buttressed the point by ensuring she joined him on cinema trips where movies heavily pregnant with profanity and sex-worship were free to proceed through those open-doors of her mind to birth all they carried.

Done with his humorous tale of his boss, he fixed on her a steady, relaxed gaze and casually began adorning her with several compliments concerning her looks; each compliment more intimate than the former. Uncomfortable as she kept getting with his detailed expressions of admiration of her exterior, she laughed and widened her eyes appropriately at each inappropriate comment, letting him know that he was overdoing it and yet simultaneously rationalizing his actions internally by reminding herself that he’d always been the forward and honest type – and didn’t God recommend honesty as a necessary element in the life of one saved?

Exactly.

Anyway, at his offer to replenish her near exhausted juice supply, she shook her head and suggested he give her a tour of the outdoor premises of his home instead. Really all she wanted was a little distraction.

And maybe some fresh air as well…it was getting a tad too hot.
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To be continued in next post....
Please feel free to share your thoughts as the story progresses. :)

xxx, Kwiksie.